This is the Planet Hollywood restaurant in downtown Dallas. I have never eaten in any Planet Hollywood; I'd heard the food wasn't that, uh, stellar. (And now I may never get a chance to; all of the Planet Hollywoods I know of have closed, and this one with the big lizard probably is, too). But that is not why I want to go to Dallas.

"God Bless America".

"United We Stand".

They were heartening back then. They have become the worst cliches in the universe today.

Can't we think of any new inspirational patriotic phrases? Such as, "America Kicks Butt Best" and "We're #1. No Fooling." Can you think of any others? Please?

But I digress.

I would like to pay a visit (or two, or three, or four...) to this attractive building. What is in this building that is so enticing?

Drumroll, please....(rat-tat-tat-tat-tat...) It's the place where you can find STARS!

No, this is not a planetarium...it's the American Airlines Center, home of the soon-to-be Stanley Cup champion Dallas Stars!

If I lived in Dallas, I wouldn't have to settle for seeing Stars live only three times a year, when they visit the (ahem) Ducks. I wouldn't have to see them on TV (almost) only when they play the Ducks or Kings. I could see forty-one games live, eighty-two overall, plus playoff games...

And then I would be even more broke, in money and time, than I am right now.

Maybe it's a good thing I don't live here.